What's happened to Larry Legend?

A few years back, he inexplicably gave Ron Artest a second chance to screw the Pacers over. Which Ron did. Then he traded Artest for half a season of Peja Stojakovic. When that didn't work out, he spent an entire summer trying to bring Al Harrington back to Indiana, succeeded, and then almost immediately traded Al away (along with Stephen Jackson and some other garbage) for (primarily) Mike Dunleavy Jr. and Troy Murphy. Oh, he also signed Jamaal Tinsley to a six-year contract extension (which lasts through 2010-11) and failed to pull the trigger on several trades that would have gotten Jermaine "The Drain" O'Neal and his Contract from the Black Lagoon out of Indiana. And all the while he has been slowly transforming into a fat gremlin.

I thought Larry's outofhisdamnmindness had reached its nadir when he recently told Dan Patrick, "When I think about the fact that he (Kobe) has never won an MVP award, it makes me want to give back one of mine." Holy crap, Larry! Why not just give Boston's 1984 NBA title to the Lakers because Kevin McHale clotheslined Kurt Rambis? Or maybe you should just tell the world that, if you were black, you'd be just another good guy? I mean, what's next??

The answer: This is what's next: Bird is suing two people for using his name in vain.

The gist of the story is this: Georgianna Lincoln and Christopher Cooke bought Larry's childhood home and turned it into a resort called Legend of French Lick. The resort's Web site says that "A unique and unforgettable experience awaits you at Legend of French Lick Resort, the former home of basketball great Larry Bird."

And that's pretty much where the Larry Bird connection ends. It's basically a "Larry used to live here" plug. There's even a big disclaimer at the bottom of the ever page that reads as follows: "Legend of French Lick, LLC, an Indiana limited liability company, owns the former home of Larry Bird. Neither Larry Bird, nor the Larry Joe Bird Revocable Living Trust, nor any entity or person affiliated with Mr. Bird, nor any member of Mr. Bird's family has any legal, financial or other interest in Legend of French Lick, LLC or the Legend of French Lick Resort."

So what's the problem? Larry and, of course, his lawyers are claiming that the couple don't have permission to use his name and are profiting off his trademark by stating the home belonged to him. But...but...the home did belong to him.

Of course, there's a bunch of legal wrangling and back-and-forth stuff that goes much further into trademark law than I care to think about. It seems like a lot of superdickery to me. It's not like this mom and pop resort is costing him money or hurting his good name. But what do I know.

Labels: douchebaggery, frivolous lawsuits, Larry Bird